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Armenia’s 2016 Eurovision Entry

April 7, 2016



As you know, the first Christian country is supposed to have been Armenia.   (Possibly Ethiopia, but this is Eurovision).

Well, according to this video, Jesus has returned, to Armenia appropriately enough, but he doesn’t seem best pleased.

Here’s the video…

Iveta Mukuchyan (cos that’s her name) starts off whispering the opening lyrics – because that makes the lyrics sound more important.  Then there’s a great orchestral surge that is probably meant to evoke the dramatic crescendo in The Beatles’ “Day in the Life”, but which actually just sounds like accelerated dental torture.

Iveta has a fair set of pipes on her, and the song is dressed up well, though I couldn’t for the life of me hum it thirty seconds after having heard it (which is sort of the litmus test ain’t it?).  Grumpy Jesus shows up sporadically through the video and it’s clear that Iveta has a thing for him.  The video also offers images of liquid intimacy – corpuscular fragmentation and consolidation alongside stuff that looks like spermatozoa.   We may be in dodgy Dan Brown bloodline territory here.  Ugh.

Bizarrely, Armenia’s dodgy relationship with Grumpy Jesus offers some light relief after last year’s entry, which was devoted to the centenary of the Armenian genocide.  Not coincidentally, Turkey didn’t show up for last year’s contest.

Turkey isn’t showing up this year either.  For those of us less interested in music than in geo-political machinations, this might indicate a strategic low profile when it comes to Turkey’s relationship with Europe right now.  The movement of peoples fleeing Syria has created a climate of fear which Europe’s politicians are too soulless and spineless to interrogate.  David Cameron will be grateful for Turkey’s absence this year, a matter of weeks before the referendum, because the very mention of the place feeds the inchoate pottage of anxieties that fuels the “Leave” campaign.


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